The Overwhelmed Woman: Part Two

by Jill Crossland

Read Part One   Jill's article "The Overwhelmed Woman" was featured in the women's section of the Chestermere Anchor, June 5th edition.

Our last newsletter looked at the signs of being overwhelmed; not only what it was doing to us mentally & physically but also its affect on our personal and professional lives.

How did we get to this point? There used to be enough hours in the day to get it all done and a time when our mind and body were in sync. Back then we could also function on a few hours sleep & fast food, stay out late night before & show up to work the next day, bright eyed, the adrenalin flowing.

These days however, there is the realization that our minds and bodies are not coping as well as they once did, which brings us to the question, 'What do we do about it?'

First, we need to identify the habits that have so integrated themselves into our lives that we may no longer see them as anything but normal.

1. You are comfortable in your stress zone
   Being continually overloaded can be addictive.
   It becomes a safe place from which we don't have to stop and be accountable.
   As long as we keep running around saying "I am too busy", we don't have to try something new, which brings with it risk and our fear of the unknown, while the busy state is in contrast safe and familiar.

2. Accepting the influence of others
   Too many people in your life saying:
   "I think you should..."
   "Why don't you..."
   "In my opinion..."
   No matter how well intended, all those opinions don't help. What they do is increase your feelings of being overwhelmed. If you need the advice of others keep the list short. As for everyone else, merely say "I will think about it, thank you" and don't let them put you on the defensive.

3. You overwhelm yourself
   You start on a goal or project, and then your mind begins to over think every stage even to the end result. As a Life Coach this is an area that I work on a lot with clients; how to achieve their goals one manageable step at a time. How not to weigh themselves down with the 'what ifs' and this often means looking at their fears and 'what ifs' head on.

Now that we have identified these behaviors, let's look at making changes that will bring life back to a manageable level.

• Outsource, outsource, outsource
  Hire a weekly cleaning lady, a virtual assistant, an accountant, a professional organizer. Create a team to help you and you will be amazed at not only how relieved you feel but how much more money you end up actually making.
• Check your level of emotional commitment
  Are you too wrapped up in your friend's problems or they in yours?
  Is it time to give your children more independence?
  Are you going overboard to please clients?
  Are you making sudden, emotional business decisions instead of well thought out, practical ones?
• Mentally and physically slow down
  When we slow down and concentrate on the here and now we accomplish much more. Look for creative ways to give yourself breaks in the day. Try using 15 minute breaks as a reward for finishing your client billing, after a long meeting or when you have completed a proposal.

Listen to your instincts and be aware of any physical symptoms that are telling you that it is time to make some changes. Most of all take time for yourself, only a strong and recharged you can accomplish all the things that you dream of doing.

Read Part One

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